Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Look what the cat dragged in...

It’s me! Back from the dead…or the huge crank I had on from the surgery and the weeks that followed. I should apologize for my absence…I have often thought of the blog, but well, I have been feeling rather lobotomized lately – void of thought or creativity. I’m certain I’ve lost some of my loyal readership, which is unfortunate because for a while there I was up to a buck and a quarter on an “important news” day…which was a great accomplishment, especially considering I know only about 7 people. My “Google Analytics” tracking shows that interest in my blog has plummeted an impressive 62%. I did it to myself…I did.

A bit about me. Well I wonder on just about an hourly basis if the D&C procedure really worked. I know I had a balloon in there for about a week and continued to eat fistfuls of Estrace tablets, but one can’t be sure. The doctor did seem optimistic when I had the balloon removed, but in my crazy mind I picture it all slowly caving in towards itself and sticking back together again.

Is the real estate now good enough for my ice bubs?

A fellow blogger referred me to a great donor egg forum…it has been fascinating and eye opening. I am not alone and many women exactly like me have had to try 2 or more egg donors before becoming successful. A lot of women get donors through agencies, and despite age and medical testing for the donor, end up with nothing. NOTHING. I simply cannot imagine. I believe as the recipients (people like me) get wiser, the agencies have to change their policies. There are a lot of agencies that are now doing insured cycles, meaning that the recipients won’t be out of pocket should the cycle be a disaster. One woman mentioned that she paid the agency fee of $6,800, waited for the donor to be free to cycle and found out she had gotten married and had become pregnant and the woman lost all of her money.

Insult to injury.

But it’s been a great resource and I’m happy to have been referred there. A woman told me the other day that the only two times she has ever been pregnant in her entire life was with her son and with her daughter, and both were from frozen embryo transfers…which I am about to do.

So just when I thought I was completely out of hope, I’ve managed to scrape a tiny little bit more off the bottom.


MIL said...

Good to see you back in action. Sometimes it's good to take a break and then come back to your quest. Just when you think you will never get over something, the mind changes course, tampers with your memory, all the bad stuff is out the window and you move on. The next time could be "the one". That's what we all want to see. BTW, I did check occasionally to see if you were posting, so I am sure your other regulars will be back soon.

Anonymous said...

Welcome back Lise! I've missed you and your fabulous writing.