Ooops

Forgot to mention - I got the call (bout bloody time). My consult is on Jan 26. Lolita at my clinic said one can safely assume a 2 month wait between consult and surgery, but that works out well actually. I'll have the consult, we'll go to Maui, I'll return and have the surgery, rest and then we're on for another IVF! Its exciting, but a word of advice for you hopefuls...don't get them up too high!

THANKS FOR READING

Just wanted to give everyone here a big THANK YOU for all your heart felt comments...and most of the time I can tell who you are! I soooo appreciate every single word - there's nothing like getting comments to posts...its like a mini-Christmas every time I log on to find one! I love what everyone has to say...I adored the last one, it was honest and open.

So thanks for being honest - that's important!! And please keep participating - and posting whatever you want. It doesn't have to be in reply to a specific post...just say what you want to say. Anytime.

So thanks to family and friends - its been rough, no question, but you've all been so supportive and I couldn't have gotten through it all without you.

xo

ps don't forget to laugh every day! I do!
(good for the endorphins)

A more serious post...

You know, you try to come to terms with certain things - why things come easily to some, the behavior of others in relation to what you're going through, etc. etc., and sometimes you just feel lost - like no one sees or understands what you are going through because they're just getting on with their lives...and you can't blame them, THEY don't live with infertility EVERY SINGLE DAY. And then you talk to others in your exact situation and they make it make sense...you know? I was feeling like people were forgetting what I was going through, and that this situation I find myself in has become normal and that I'm just fine because I'm not bursting into tears every time I see a baby. But I don't want people to forget, because then it seems like they've given up on me too. I need people to stay on top of me...to ask me...to talk to me about it...but in a way that is kind, and considerate of what I've experienced...in other words, don't pretend to know what I'm going through. You have NO idea. Just listen and be supportive and don't talk out your ass. There are few people who know what I'm going through and one of them is B from the Peach. She and her husband have been struggling with infertility for 4 years, although her story is much more painful IMO for reasons I won't discuss here as its HER story... She's a wonderfully caring person and has such an amazing talent for exploring and breaking down the emotions related to infertility. I vented about the stupid things people say and she responded...

"...with short-term health crises, the problem happens, you talk to other people about it, they give you support, then the problem is resolved and people move on. Because the affected person is talking about the problem, people are on best behavior (or at least they try to be). People try to say the right things, they ask about it, they listen, they expect you to talk about it.

But with long term infertility, this dynamic gets messed up. I know from my own experience, I got to a point where I didn't want to talk about it much, because I started to feel like people would see me as a "Debbie Downer" all the time. I worried that people would be tired of hearing about it. Heck, I get tired of talking about it. So you stop talking about it, which gives others the impression that maybe you're doing A-OK or that it's not an issue anymore, and so maybe they start to talk off the cuff more in ways that can be hurtful."

Bingo.

There was more to the post, but I thought this part was worth posting here, because it is so well said. Thanks again B!

Don't think you're lucky? Think again...

I used to think people who got pregnant right away were so lucky!
And then I thought, wow, people who got pregnant within a year are so lucky!
And then I thought DEFINITELY women who got pregnant on their first IVF attempt are so lucky!
And then I thought if you can get pregnant within 3 IVF's then you are definitely lucky!
Then I thought people who adopt are so lucky!

Now I think if I ever get a baby through adoption I will be so lucky! HA!

So if you take are walking around like a zombie because your kids kept you up all night, or you have throwup on your best sweater, or you need to make 8 dozen cookies for the bakesale tomorrow, or you have a household full of phlegmmy kids...you know what I say?

YOU ARE SO LUCKY!